DIY Project: Centerpieces

If there was one advice that I could give brides, it would be to not pay for anything that you can do/make yourself.  Actually, the first thing I would advise is to hire a Day of Coordinator.  The second thing I would advise is to not pay for anything that you can do/make yourself! Which leads me to the first of my DIY series posts.  Hopefully, I can keep these up now that the wedding is over.

Here are some disclaimers before I begin:

First of all, I'm the type of person who likes to DIY.  It's actually enjoyable for me.  But I realize that alot of these projects aren't going to be as fun for everyone. Secondly, not all DIY projects will save you the most money.  There will always be less expensive options for invitations, seating charts, floral, etc.  But for the type things that I wanted, my projects did save me money in the end.   Lastly, uupfront planning is key.  Picture the projects in your head.  Write down the steps you need to do in order to get to the final product and make a list of tools and supplies that you'll need.  I also practiced and went through several trial and error.  I didn't decide to just do these things one day and then have them all turn out perfectly the first time around.

Still interested?  Keep on reading!

Oh wait, I do have another disclaimer =)  For the purposes of these DIY series, I'm going to be using I alot and not WE (as in my groom and I)...because let's face it, the brides usually drive details of the wedding more than the groom.  I will however give my groom alot of credit for allowing me to take on these projects and cluttering up our house.  He is OCD so this is a big deal for him.

My vision for the reception centerpieces was inspired by another bride.  After seeing her wedding pictures on facebook, I knew that I HAD TO HAVE crystal candelabras and roses for the wedding. Unfortunately, all the quotes I received for crystal candelabra rentals or purchases were just too much.  Floral quotes were even more ridiculous.  I had to figure out a way to get what I want without paying too much. 

And here's how I did it...

Candelabras:  

Luckily, another friend/bride was getting married and agreed to share the cost of purchasing candelabras.  Her wonderful fiance/now husband did some research and found a local florist that wanted to sell her candelabras to make room for new ones.  There was one down side.  The candelabras she was selling were not crystal...they were silver.  Still, I saw the picture and thought, hey I can work with that! Another tidbit about saving money is that sometimes you have to adjust your vision and know when to stop and take what you can get!  They're still gorgeous though!

This cost us $500 for 12 candelabras.  She used only 10 of them and I used 11.  They came in pieces and I assembled them about a month before the wedding with my sisters (who hated life while we were putting them together but I didn't think it was that bad =) The worst part for me was transporting them to the reception but we were able to drop it off during our final payment meeting so I didn't have to worry about them after that.

Floral Centerpieces:
I needed to make 20 small arrangements in julep cups so that I could place them underneath the candelabras (later on realized I was short two more!  Fast thinking coordinator used the bridesmaids bouquest after the ceremony =).  I also needed four larger arrangements in mercury hurricanes to go on the tables without the candelabras. I planned on making all 24 arrangements with a mixture of hydrangeas and roses.  The julep cups were purchased from the florist that made my bouquets and bouts at $5 each and I purchased mercury hurricanes at Michael's over the holiday at $7 each.

Roses - Initially, I blogged about this crazy idea to make 500 coffee filter roses which would have cost me a mere $20 but a crap load of labor hours!  You can read about it here: http://www.aktionspeakswedding.blogspot.com/2011/02/diy-project-flowers.html .
But time and laziness got the best of me and I quit after making 100 of them (Don't worry, I put the 100 in good use and will write a separate post about what I did with them).  After doing research, I decided to go ahead and buy flowers from Costco and make the arrangements myself.  I called the floral lady at Costco and had her set aside 7 bunches of 24 roses for me which I picked up Thursday afternoon before our Saturday wedding.  Although I asked for very light pink roses, the ones she set aside for me were  darker than what I wanted.  I still bought them though (note tidbit about taking what you can get =). I also saw a couple of very light pink ones on the floor and bought two bunches of those.  In total I spent $119 on roses. 

Hydrangeas - I purchased the bulk 30 stem white hydrangeas from Costco.com.  They were shipped to me early Thursday morning . Once they came in, I took them out of the box, dipped the heads in water for a second and shook off the excess, cut a little off the stem and them put them in buckets with water and flower food (oh what you learn from YouTube!)  To be honest they looked pretty sorry when they arrived but by the time I got back home from my pedi later that afternoon, they all perked up and looked amazing!  The 30 stem hydrangeas cost me $94 including shipping.

All the suplies!

One hydrangea and 4-5 roses went into each julep cup arrangements (excuse the bad lighting!).  I had lightbulb moment to "hoard" crate cup holders from starbucks so I can use them to transport the finished arrangements ::pats self on back::

Two hydrangeas and 5-6 roses went into each mercury hurricane arrangement.  I also put flora lites inside the mercury hurricanes (friend gave them to me)

                                                            Size comparison of the two different arrangements

Thursday evening, my sister and I made all the arrangements before and after dinner.  It took us approximately 2-3 hours to finish. I had way more flowers than I needed so I made two additional arrangements.  One was an all rose arrangement which went on the sweetheart table.  The other one I just left at home. 

Friday morning my groom and I took all the arrangements to the florist making our bouqets and bouttonnieres.  They stored them in their cooler and delivered to the venue on Saturday before they delivered the bouquets and bouttonnieres to the hotel. 

In total, I spent:
Candelabra + tapered candles: $300
Mint Julep Cups: $100
Mercury Hurricanes: $28
Votive Holders + Tea lights: $50?
Roses: $119
Hydrangeas: $94
Deliver: $40 (they only asked for $20 but I gave extra )
Total: $741

I had 20 tables to decorate so breakdown is $37/table.  I definitely think I saved for the type of centerpieces I wanted  =)

OK now the pictures of the centerpieces in action! (excuse the crappy I phone pics )

                                             Mercury hurricane arrangements surrounded by stemmed votives

Candelabra with white tapered candles, mint julep cup arrangements, and votives

                                                             Picture of the room

DIY Wedding Invitations - Lessons Learned

After 9 hours straight (yes, nine long hours) of working on our wedding invitations, I finally decided to call it a night. And while brushing my teeth just minutes ago, ideas popped into my head all of the sudden of how I could have done things differently in an easier and faster way. Sadly, I'm already nearing the end of this invitation making process and won't get a chance to implement my ideas. But I thought I would share it here for other brides who are also making their own invitations.

1. Mounting the Mat and Main Invitation onto the Pocket Fold

What I Did

The design of my invitations is a basic 5 x 7 Pocket Fold with a left and right panel. Both panels have an accent base mat. The left panel has the main invitation on white paper that is mounted on the top of the base mat (the main invitation measures about 1/8" smaller on each side than the base mat) The right panel of the pocket fold are the inserts. Once my invitations are mailed, I will definitely upload a picture so you can get a better idea of what I'm talking about. Anyway, when I mounted the base mat onto the left side of the pocketfold, I basically "eyeballed" the center of the panel. This was not exactly the ideal method and of course, I was never able to perfectly align it on each side. But, I am hoping that I did a decent enough job that the imperfections aren't immediately noticed. The same "eyeballing" method was used when I mounted the Main Invitation onto the base mat yielding the same inconsistent results. Also, because I was "eyeballing", it took me forever to get it just right such that the invitation would land almost perfectly in the middle of the mat base.

What I Should Have Done

When I had my "Aha!" moment, I was happy yet angry at the same time. Happy because I had finally figured out how to properly mount the paper but angry because I had already mounted all the paper I had and couldn't re-do them. Anyways, my "Aha!" moment is pretty simple and I really don't know why I hadn't thought of it sooner. What I should have done is measure from the top of the pocketfold 1/8" and then make a faint pencil mark (just a dot or something). Then, from the left side of the pocketfold, place my ruler such than it's 1/8" from the edge. All I would have to do from here is mount the base mat flush against the ruler on the left side and align the top to the pencil mark I made. Assuming that all of my paper were pre cut by professionals, the rest of the sides should have equal spacing of 1/8" from the edge of each side of the pocketfold panel. This same process would be applied for mounting the main invitation onto the base mat.

2. Design, Print, Cut

What I Did

For some reason, I found it much easier to design everything on PowerPoint. There, I was able to fit two insert panels per page (Inserts are: Main invitation, Direction insert, Accommodation insert, Reception insert, and RSVP insert). I then printed the design on an 8.5 X 11 Sheet of paper and painstakingly cut each and every sheet so that I could separate the two panels. Because I am making 150 invitations with a total of 5 inserts, that means that I cut 375 pieces of paper one by one (actually, so far only 300 sheets because I haven't cut the RSVP cards yet). I started printing this past Sunday and finished cutting paper by Wednesday which means that it took me approximately 17 hours to print and cut alone.

What I Should Have Done

The last thing I did tonight was print mailing addresses on each individual outer envelope through the top feeder of my printer. It was pretty easy and I did it through Microsoft Word. All I had to do was set the paper size to 5x7 (the size of my invites), type in the name and address in the middle of the page and print. I suppose the repetitive nature of the task finally beat it into my head that I really should have gotten my paper pre-cut at any office supply store. They can cut up to 100 sheets at a time in a matter of seconds and it only cost $1.50-$2 per cut (not per sheet of paper). Similar to what I did with the envelopes, I should have typed my design on Word with the page setting set on custom sized paper (just indicate what size I had my paper cut) and then fed the pre-cut paper through the top feeder of my printer. I anticipate that changing the process from Design in Power Point - Print - Cut to Design in Word - Cut - Print would have probably saved me 12 hours.

Despite the tedious work, I'm happy to report that the invitations are coming along really well. Hopefully, I can implement these ideas for some of my other friend's future weddings (if they choose to go the DIY route....which I hope they will ; ).

Pictures coming soon!

Prepare for Marriage

This past November, Joe and I celebrated our 6 year anniversary and for the most part, we've always felt like we already know everything there is to know about each other. What else is there to know? I know the look he gets when he's day dreaming in the car. I can tell exactly what he ate from the smell of his poo. And from the slightest change in the tone of his voice, I can tell if he's lied to me about something.

So as most brides, I've focused mainly on what needs to be done for the big day and little time getting to know my husband to be.

It was no surprise that I waited until the last minute to figure out how we would meet our Pre-Cana requirement to be married in the Catholic Church. We figured that with Joe's work schedule, it would be nearly impossible to make multiple trips to meet with our priest. Engaged Encounter weekend was our only option. Engaged Encounter is basically Pre-Cana compressed in one weekend. It's a retreat where you and your fiance discuss topics that really should be discussed before committing to a lifelong partnership. Topics range from how you will handle money as a married couple (by the way this is the #1reason people divorce!) to better communication skills. It's therapy - sponsored by the Catholic Church.

None of the topics discussed during the weekend were new to us. The main difference was that our conversations about them in the past were in passing. Typically, we would be faced with some challenge - money for example - of how we would split a certain expense - and that's when we'd talk about how we should handle money going forward. The Engaged Encounter setting forces you to talk about these topics and nothing else. There's not television in the background...there isn't someplace else you need to be.

Aside from committing the time to get to know each other better, the biggest benefit we got out of this was our general attitude toward our "trigger points". You know, the things that really irk people about each other. After a certain amount of years together, there are certain words or sentences...innocent as they may be...that could trigger crazy amounts of irritation. For Joe, it's probably my almost nightly request for a glass of water when he's already tucked himself comfortably in bed...and for me, it's the tone of his voice when I call him at work (because a customer pissed him off and I'm on the receiving end of the frustration). So back to what we learned about this (also applicable to alot of other situation), was surprisingly simple - "Decide to love".

{commence puking and sarcastic remarks from the audience}

Yes, the answer is simply to decide to love. Getting ready to get that last word in an argument and really stick it to them by bringing back some old issue? Decide to love instead and keep your mouth shut. Let the laundry sit there because you don't really care if it's folded or not? Decide to love instead and just fold the damn pile because you know that for some odd reason, it makes him crazy happy that you would.

We decide our emotions. We decide our actions.

Decide to love.

Wedding planning can be crazy. Almost every weekend on our calendars are already spoken for. But you have to set aside some time to prepare for marriage. For us, we sacrificed an already planned family vacation because it was literally the only weekend we could go. It was worth every penny ($350 for the weekend including meals for the both of us) and for you non-Catholic folks, you don't even have to be Catholic to go.

This is probably going to be the cheapest thing you'll spend in preparation for the wedding...but it's going to be the most worth while.

Budget Advice: Make a List and Be on the Look Out

Most of us are on a budget especially when it comes to weddings where most everything is marked up. Therefore, it's important to be on the lookout for things that you need to buy, even if you think that it's still a little early, because you might miss out on a deal.

When you start planning, make a list of things that you know you'll need to buy. Even if it's just a general one, it's good to keep a list handy (I'm a dork so I still carry around a filofax and keep my list there) so that when a good sale comes up, you can quickly look if the sale might fulfill any of your must buy items.

Some of the things on my list which I've found deals on are:


Wedding dress - Well, we all know what happened with my wedding dress shopping "situation". I went a little crazy and ended up with multiple dresses. Luckily, they were all deals while keeping an eye out for sample sales and I didn't do too much damage to my wallet. You can read about it here and even after that trip, I did actually end up buying two more which are the two that I will be wearing (one for the ceremony and one for the reception). In total, my wedding dress purchases total $1500...but retails for well over $8000.

Bridesmaid dress - From the get go, I knew I wanted my bridesmaids to wear long black dresses. You'd think it was easy to find long black dresses right? I have to admit, it was a little too easy and this is when I had to learn my lesson of buying too many wedding dresses to be a bit pickier with my bridesmaids dresses. A couple of deals came and went and at times I thought I passed up a good thing - Like this dress from jcrew (in black) that was on sale for $200 from almost $500 full price.

But at that price point, it still didn't seem like a deal. A few more visits to jcrew's website when they e-mailed me about sales and I finally took the plunge with classic silk chiffon dresses for $100 (orig. $350). I was able to snag the remainder of their stock which were all luckily in my bridesmaid's sizes.

Flower girl dress
A month ago, I was really sad to hear that Priscilla of Boston was closing. I spent many crazy hours there during their sample sales and was looking to someday be able to take my friends when it's their turn to shop for their dresses. However, store closing = closeout sale and leave it to me to come up with an excuse to go...partly to see what I could find to cross out something on my "list" but mainly so I could take a peek at the wedding dresses on sale =). Keeping my focus (after porousing through EVERY wedding dress they had), I headed straight for the bridal party section and found the cutest blush pink dress with a tulle skirt for our two flower girls. The store only had one (luckily in my flower girl's size by the time the wedding comes around) but another store was willing to ship an identical dress to me. The dresses ended up costing $25 each so I didn't mind paying the extra $10 shipping cost for the second dress. The dress can still be found at Nordstrom for $150:





I've found a few more great items at a great deal by simply keeping a list on hand when a sale comes up like a picture card box that I purchased for my friend's bridal shower (I also got one for our wedding) on the sale for half price at http://www.theperfectcardbox.com/. I also found my bridesmaids presents at a great deal but I don't want to divulge since I haven't given it to them.


All of these things are typically "last minute" purchases for weddings but if you're on a tight budget but don't want to sacrifice the nicer things in life, spacing your purchases and keeping an eye out for deals is the way to go.


I hope you guys don't think I'm too cheap.


Ok, I AM cheap ; )


Happy shopping!

The Second Funnest Thing About Planning a Wedding - The Bachelorette Party

Blessed with amazingly fun sisters and girlfriends I've gotten a chance to go on some really great destination bachelorette parties without breaking the bank. While planning for my friend's bachelorette this upcoming summer (tomorrow actually!), I thought it might be a good idea (plus an excuse to reminisce) about two destination parties I've had the honor of attending. Hopefully, this will help a first-time bridesmaid plan one

1. St. Thomas, USVI

In 2009, 11 of us girls spent four days at the Frenchman's Reef and Morningstar Bay in St. Thomas. We booked two units by the beach and I remember paying some ridiculously cheap rate at less than $100/person for our stay. As luck would have it, one of the bridesmaid knew someone who worked for Marriott and was able to get us an employee rate for the rooms. Still, when I was researching units at the newly built Marriott timeshare right next to this resort, I found two-bedroom units renting at $250/night which would have been comparable to what we spent back then.

[aerial view of the hotel]

I know that St. Thomas isn't necessarily one of those places you immediately think of when planning for a bachelorette because it is a beach town and you're suppose to just relax and do nothing. But surprisingly, we always ended up at a fun bar/club every night we were there. Cab drivers were always friendly and trustworthy, and we were never short of things to do.

[at a local bar near the hotel]

During one of the days, the group decided to take the ferry to St. John to see Trunk Bay...and I would have to say that I've never seen a more beautiful beach than that.

[beautiful Trunk Bay]

In all, I anticipated that each person spent about $400 on hotel and airfare. I actually spent even less than that because I used frequent flier miles which made my flight free! I ended up booking it last minute and was able to use just 25,000 US Airways points for my round trip flight.

Last bit of money saving advice, we purchased bottles of alcohol at duty free while we were still on the aplane. We did alot of pregaming so that we wouldn't spend so much money at the bars. One of the girls also met a chef during one of our nights out and he offered to cook us dinner at his restaurant one night. Lastly, with the bride's savvy bargaining skills, she was able to convince the manager to give each one of us girls one free meal per day at either the breakfast buffet or the beachfront restaurant. Yes, we worked hard for our food =) Good times!

2. Playa del Carmen, Mexico

Playa del Carmen is one of those places that I wouldn't mind going to every year. It's such a versatile destination that would be good for a romantic getaway, family vacation, and yes, even a bachelorette party! Because I had previously visited, it made it a bit easier for me to plan my older sister's bachelorette party last year and again for my friend's bachelorette party this year. Gee, can you tell that I really like PdC??

In 2010, booking our flight was super easy. I found a deal on AirMexicana (since bankrupt) that cost each person only $297 each round trip. In terms of accommodations, we booked a three bedroom beachfront condo that cost each person $133 for the 4 days that we were there. For the eight girls that went, the condo was plenty big for everyone. A huge plus was that the condo was literally ON the beach - meaning you open the patio door and your first step is sand. You can book it here: http://aquazulplaya.com/ (we booked Ocean Plaza 3)

[view as soon as you open the patio door]

The location of this condo was perfect. Out on the beach was a beachfront massage place which according to my friend only cost $25/hr. I'm still kicking myself for not getting a massage there but you better believe that I'm going to get one everyday next time I go! One block from our condo was "club row". Alot of the bars and clubs were located there and we frequented Blue Parrot which was a beachfront bar/club. Ok, frequented means we went there EVERY night! It was just so much fun and the music was great that we didn't feel the need to go anywhere else. Although we did try other places, we always ended the night there.

For some daytime fun an adventure, we also booked an all day tour zip lining, cliff jumping, and cave snorkeling with a company called Edventure (http://www.edventure.org/). We opted for a shorter version of the tour they offer and paid $80/person including transportation. It was definitely one of the highlights of the trip and we all got to do something we would never do... like zip lining upside down!

[Yup, it's as fun as it looks!]

[walking around the cute streets of PdC]

To save money on drinks, we walked to a local convenient store and bought rum and juice there. The condo came with a blender and we made our own blended drinks for the beach everyday. The food was pretty inexpensive as well. We did have one dinner on the expensive side but otherwise, we ordered pizza or went to a well known taco place that was really cheap. In total, each person spent $540 which includes airfare, accommodations, airport transportation, and the all day excursion.

So that's it for now! Next recap: last year's Bachelorette party to New Orleans and the one I'm going to tomorrow back in Playa del Carmen =)

DIY Project: Flowers

When we put together our wedding budget last year, we estimated a certain amount that we could spend on floral arrangements, bouquets, and anything flower related. Flowers wasn't even something that I thought I needed to address until much later on the planning process so I started focusing on other things that needed more immediate attention. However, while sifting through wedding forums like theknot, I quickly realized that we REALLY under-budgeted for a florist. Alot of the forum posts commented that a $3k florist quotes were "reasonable"and "cheap" to which I responded with (to myself of course), F-THAT! I mean really? $3k on flowers that will wilt within a few days??

So I started researching other options...took some trips to Michaels and went online to see how much "fake" flower arrangements would cost me. Surprisingly, those weren't that affordable either costing up to $6 PER fake rose....to which I responded, F-THAT too!

I considered forgoing florals (at least for centerpieces) all together and looked into options like crystal candelabras and manzanita tree centerpieces.

So pretty right??

And even though I've finally settled on having a non-floral centerpiece (which will be another post), the table-scape just didn't seem complete without any.

Then came Martha Stewart...or rather, her website which provided me with a tutorial for DIY roses made out of coffee filters. I figured it wouldn't hurt to at least give it a try and see how fast I could make one because I estimated that I would need about 500 roses total.

Progression of the project...

First, Martha tells you to cut up 8 different types of petals. At first try, I followed the directions to a tee and did just that. But I eventually figured out that I could use just three types of petals to yield the same looking rose.

Picture of my first few flowers before and after I painted it.

Martha also tells you to paint each petal after you've already assembled one rose. This was pretty annoying so I decided to paint all my petals beforehand.

I finally put my old acrylic set to use which I had to dig out at the very back of our storage. Sad...

All the little petals drying after painting...

And here's a bunch more of the final product...

I'm not 100% sure that I should really invest the time and effort into making 500 of these. To be perfectly honest, it was a bit tedious to cut so many petals, paint them and then assemble them into a rose....but at the cost of close to nothing and the fact that my wedding is still a year and a half away, it's hard to not give this idea a serious thought.

Total cost approx breakdown for 500 roses:

Coffee Filters: $50

Floral Wire: $17

Floral Tape: $5

Painting tools: Free

Labor: $10000000000000000000000000000000000 =)

First DIY Project: Invitations!

My first attempt at breaking the robot in me was to get back in touch with my crafty/artsy side by practicing how to emboss for my future invitations. Sad as it may sound, I haven't felt this excited since high school when things like going to art lessonsand making home-made cards were what I looked forward to doing most after school.

Sitting in my parent's dining room, I opened up all the goodies I purchased right before the snow storm, which included some plain invitations, stamps, clear ink, embossing powder, and an embossing heating tool.

My goal was to at least learn how to emboss so that sometime next year, I can make my invitations to look somewhat like these (from the weddingbee):

At first attempt, I practiced embossing initials because I wanted to incorporate our initials on the outside of our pocketfolds. I got a little excited and actually ended up embossing these upside down on the first two cards. Really, I was THAT excited! At the third attempt, I finally got this:

For the inside, I practiced embossing a pattern with some of the stamps I found. For the actual invite, I'm having a pretty hard time finding a stamp with a pattern that I really like (i.e. the exact ones from the weddingbee inspiration). At least for practice, I ended up with this:

So you're probably wondering - Is it really worth all the effort to do your own invitations? As I expressed frustration in messing up my first two trials, I could see my family (who thought I was crazy for doing all this), ask themselves this very question. Through online research, I actually found that I could probably have invitations (which would I be perfectly happy with) professionally made for fairly cheap - maybe even cheaper than what it would cost for me to do it myself.

What makes it worth it for me is the prospect of creating again - to experience that joy and sense of accomplishment of starting from scratch and then see your final product come to life. I'm sure my patience will be tested. I'm sure that at some point during this process, I'll want to give up and just order the invites online. Still, I have a smile on my face just thinking about the work it will take to get all of this done and that's just something you can't put a price tag on.

The mess I made at my parent's house:

To my neat freak fiance - "I'm sorry" in advance!

Five Hundred and Twenty Two

....days to go until May 5, 2012 - Our wedding day

Must I really wait 522 days to see all of my ideas come to life? I wonder how many more dresses I'll buy (and hopefully sell). I wonder how many times I'll change my colors. More importantly, I wonder how much money I'll be able to save!

Looking to save on the big ticket items by locking in 2010 rates, I was luckily able to book the following:

1) Venue: From the previous post, we had a very hard time deciding. In the end, my upfront research definitely paid off because the venue we picked raised their rates less than a week after our appointment. (Picture from the open house below!)

2) DJ: A highlight of my sister's wedding was the music and party atmosphere. One of the reasons for this (other than all the fun guests) was their DJ. To top it off, they offer a very reasonable rate!

3) Transportation: Although this isn't really something that people book THIS early, the venue that we selected partners with a trolley company and quoted me what seemed to be a good rate for an all-day trolley service for the bridal party and for guests to be picked up from the hotel to the reception. So I figured...why not? I might as well book them now before prices go up in 2011 and again in 2012!

4) Church: This doesn't really fall into the category of raising rates but this was the first thing that I made sure to research before I did anything else because I was not a parishioner in any of the Philadelphia churches. But through some research, I now feel better knowing that there are options for us in Philly. Pending a meeting with their priest, I hope to officially tie the knot and walk down the aisle at St. Rita of Cascia.


Venue Sneak Peak at the open house this past Sunday taken with my new camera =)



522 more days....really?!?!?

The Cronicles of an Indecisive Bride To Be...

...Should be the name of this blog.

A few people - ok most of you - know about my wedding dress "issue" and how many I have racked up even though the wedding is not until 2012. My problem is that I happen to like...no absolutely Loooove...alot of different options. I'm picky but not really. I don't even know if that makes sense.

Unfortunately, in the wedding business, there's no such thing as returns or exchanges so being indecisive is not a good thing. Most wedding dresses are final sales especially if you've altered it or purchased it at a sample sale. Wedding venues require that you put a non-refundable deposit which are at least $1000.

The issue of absolutely loving everything definitely came into play when the fiance and I booked seven wedding venue appointments yesterday. We managed to make it through all of them but one and surprise surprise, I absolutely loved every single one of them. I walked into each venue like a girl who had just realized that her dream wedding could actually come true. I "ooohed and ahhhed" and twirled around every venue's dance floor despite running on 4 hrs of sleep the night before.

At the end of the day, I knew EXACTLY where we would have our wedding (emphasize the "I knew" and not "WE knew"). The more I saw (or didn't see) the same level of enthusiasm from the fiance, the more I second guessed my choice. Luckily, contracts haven't been signed and we have two weeks to decide.


I'll save the reviews on the other venues at a later time. For now, I'd like to focus on the two that are in the running.


Option 1: Ballroom at the Ben

Pros: + Meets the budget BUT wedding must be done in March

+ Ballroom with built in up lighting and pin spot lighting on tables (only brides will appreciate this!) which is typically extra cost everywhere else (at least $500)

+ Lots of weddings have happened here and it s well photographed so I've seen lots of pictures online that validate how beautiful it is and that it can hold the number of guests that we'll be expecting

+ Slightly closer to hotels downtown


+ Fiance loves it and prefers this over Option 2


Cons: - Wedding MUST be before end of March to meet budget which is still cold weather and wedding will be during lent

- Guests park a block away in a lot and must navigate themselves to the ballroom inside a multi-purpose building (office space and condos). We can choose to pay for everyone's parking and they are given a voucher ticket at the ballroom to present to the garage attendant. I've heard from a review that didn't work out so well and guests had to pay for parking even though bride and groom pre-paid.


- Must pay extra for linens other than ivory or white

- Cocktail hour area (balcony above ballroom) looks dated


- Guests must go down elevators and out lobby of the building to get some air

Here are professional pictures...

[Source] [Source]

Option 2: Tendenza
Pros + A very unique venue that is unlike anything that I've seen. I was blown away as soon as I walked into the space


+ For a little bit more than budget, we can have the wedding in April or May which is warmer than March.

+ Included in the price is the only thing that fiance asked for which is a raw bar

+ No additional cost for different linen options and square tables

+ No additional fee for duet entree which is one of the things we are considering to have

+ For an extra fee (similar to Option 1's parking fee) our guests will have valet parking right outside of the venue at no cost to them

+ Common outdoor courtyard on the same level as venue so easy access to get air

+ Color scheme of the place matches what I wanted for our wedding colors (black, ivory, and a couple of accent colors that I haven't decided on)


Cons - It is brand new and has not officially opened so no history of weddings or online pictures to better visualize a wedding set-up

- Planner says they max out at 40 people over our planned party size. Fiance is worried that it will be tight for our size party

- Over budget by $10 per person

- Light colored floors and walls (in some areas) which look great now but worried that it will look dirty and worn by the time our wedding comes around (space is booking fast even though they haven't opened yet)

- Fiance is worried that it looks like a club


Here are some pics from my iphone. I REALLY wish I brought a camera with me that day.

Cocktail Hour space - stairs lead up to dinner/dance space




Dinner/Dance Space



One of two Bars (they are back to back - one in the Cocktail reception area and one ine the dinner/dance area)






So long story short, I'm confused yet again. Help?

It's House Hunting all Over Again!

...actually, I meant to say it's venue hunting but so far, it sure does feel like house hunting all over again

Putting the same rigor in researching venues as I did our house, all options are being considered. For the time being, I'm setting my eyes on downtown Philadelphia which is almost exactly halfway between our families. Through all the research (mainly photographer websites and wedding forums), I've found a few places that are somewhat within reach of our budget. To be exact, we're visiting seven venues and one church... all within one day during our next trip to Philadelphia.

I'm not quite sure how the day will go or if we'll actually be able to pull it off. But I am sure that the fiance and I will need lots of coffee, patience, and time management skills. In preparation for our venue-hunting day, I carefully planned out our appointment times so that we're hopping around Philly through the best, most efficient route:

Beginning at 10 am at Old St. Joseph's Church and ending at 4pm in the Northern Liberties neighborhood to see Cescaphe Ballroom and their new location Tendenza, I'm hoping that by the end of the day, we'll get a very good idea of how feasible a downtown Philadelphia wedding will be.


More updates to come once we actually see these places in person. For the time being, wish us luck!

Also, please share any questions that we should be asking the coordinators of these venues.

Thanks!

Not As Simple as Walking Down the Aisle...

Everyone knows it. Everyone talks about it to their close friends. But howcome you never see the not so fairytale side of weddings discussed out in the open? Hardly any mention of in bridal magazines and websites. Hardly any mention of it in wedding blogs...

You may have noticed my lack of posts as of late. In all honestly, it's because I've had a few of these items that I'm about to list weighing down on my mind. And when I seek advice from others, the common answer seems to be - The most important thing is what you and your groom wants. It's about your marriage and not anyone else's. And though true, the pressures of today's wedding "norm" has put that core concept of a wedding at the bottom of a very long list of delicate things that must be addressed in preparation for your special day.

So in no particular order...

1. Planning a large reception. For as long as I can remember, I've always wanted a fun wedding everyone eats well and dances afterwards. I'm not sure exactly where I got this idea from but cultural and media influences I'm sure played a role in this dream. And because we live in a capitalistic country, there are those that capitalized on the fact that millions of other girls are are dreaming up big wedding receptions. Therefore, the wedding industry emerged putting a large premium on anything wedding related. If you mention wedding at any venues, you are presented with a package showing a much higher price than if you were just planning any ole party. And the result? Let's just say that my groom is planning on picking up extra hours at work(even though I hardly ever see him) and I am now looking for a second part-time job.

2. Determining who will make the invite list. Because of #1, it's pretty much safe to say that we can't quite afford to invite everyone. Because people sometimes equate not being invited to a wedding as a sign of disrespect or that I guess you weren't really as good of a friend as you thought, then it makes this whole business of planning a wedding very political. Rather than focusing on each other's relationships, the bride and groom now have to assess their relationship with everyone else. Will this person be hurt if they don't get invite? Will they no longer talk to me? Will it affect me professionally?

3. Making sure both families are happy. Aside from a bride and groom making the commitment to God and to each other, weddings I think are also a symbolism of two families coming together. But when the two families have different traditions, beliefs, requests, and suggestions, it translates into difficult decisions for the bride and groom. How do you make both families happy? Although holding separate celebrations might satisfy the differences of both sides, it is not in the spirits of bringing two families together. In trying to determine the solution, the bride and groom will likely realize that there's really no way to make everyone happy. And although in the end...is the bride and groom's day after all...how do you say no your family?

4. Choosing who is in your wedding party. Looking through wedding forums, I'm amazed to see how many posts are about friendships that have ended because one wasn't chosen to be in the wedding party. And I'm wondering...does not being in someones wedding party really mean that you're no longer friends?

5. Expectations of your wedding party. A second popular topics in wedding forums are about how many friendships have ended because one was a disappointing bridesmaid or moh. It seems that in this day and age, there is so much emphasis on what being in the bridal party means and the responsibilities that go along with that. When reading through some of these forums, I often wonder how people could let a few "mistakes" relating to all one day trump all that their friendship has meant every day prior to the wedding.

I'm sure there are alot more to this list that can be added. But for now, I might have already shot myself in the foot by posting some of these. At least I know that I'm not the only one nor was I ever the first one to thing about these.

How about you? What are you currently/or have experienced relating to these topics and how did you address them?

Since I haven't officially asked...

I won't reveal yet the names of my actual bridesmaids. But I thought that since I wrote a little tidbid about the husband to be, that I would reflect back on the amazing women that will become the official witnesses of my marriage.

In no particular order....

Bridesmaid 1. For almost two whole years, she enjoyed being the center of the universe for two happy young couple. That is, until little ole me popped out of my mother's stomach crying....and crying...and crying for what must have been forever (from what my mom tells me). During her kindergarten or first grade graduation, I cried because I wanted to be up there with her as she received her diploma. In 1990, she finally ran far away enough for me to follow. In 1994, I was back in her face again determined never to leave her side. I followed all of her interest...the Flyers, the Braves, and Ace of Base. She may not know it but I always wanted to follow. I always strive to be like her.

Bridesmaid 2. If there was one person in this world who knew exactly how to piss me off, it's her. She's Dart Vader and I'm Yoda...which proves that even the most optimistic and patient of a person can have a short and angry side. But just like Dart Vader, she has within her a good side. Ok, that was one too many Star Wars analogy. lol. Anyway! Despite the occasional tension between us which we so often keep bottled up inside, magically...and out of nowhere...things go back to the way they've always been. Two people that genuinely care and love each other...and no matter what, I know she'll always have my back.

Bridesmaid 3. I remember the exact moment that I knew we were going to to be great friends. We were taking a stroll on the beach and she asked me a question that I hadn't heard in a very long time... she asked casually and genuinely.... "So, what do you like to do for fun?" And in the years to follow, we combined our "what do you like to do for fun" list and did them together. Partied in Vegas, relaxed in Puerto Rico, went to happy hours, talked about boys, and jumped up and down hand in hand as we celebrated her engagement. And through the years... when you realize that the party is over and you have to face the difficult parts of life, it's those that stay right there with you that are your friends for life. I'm so lucky to have met this person and one of these days, I'm going to have to give her an unforced and totally NOT akward hug. HUGS!

Bridesmaid 4. Like any other middle child, I had (and still have remnants) of extreme middle child syndrome. I was super sensitive to jokes and I felt slighted when people joked at my expense....and being the jokester that she is, we were a match made in hell from the very start. She constantly made fun of my FOB tendencies pushing every little button in me. But through those tortuous jokes, I learned that it is absolutely ok to laugh at yourself...because after all, I did do some pretty laughable things...like flip over my inside out shirt outside of a church... ::crickets::
As it turns out, behind all the jokes was my best friend who patiently listened and told it to me straight up. A no nonsense - no bs friend. When I was being a brat, she told me so. When I was acting crazy, she told me so. And when life was good, she celebrated with me. What more can you ask for in a friend?

Bridesmaid 5. On occasion, I do read up on my zodiac sign (Cancer). And all the information that I found says that Cancers are ridiculously sensitive...which causes us to act on emotion...ya know, act like one of those crazy girlfriends that leave multiple text message and voicemail? ummmmm anyway! Luckily, I met a very special friend that made me feel normal for once....for she, a fellow Cancer, was just as crazy as I was. To us, it was perfectly ok to plan our weddings before we even got engaged. We dreamed and gushed and talked about our perfect day. We gushed about our significant others to each other only to text an hour later saying that we were through and that our worlds were over. Perhaps it's not so healthy to have someone reaffirm your craziness but in actuality, she has been a person to make me want to be a better person. She taught me how to be honest with myself because not everything can be peachy and great all the time. And of course, she stood by and helped walk me through the difficult stuff.

Bridesmaid 6. Women talk alot so it's pretty rare to find a girlfriend whom you can just sit or watch tv with and not say a word....and it's perfectly ok. No awkwardness. No pressure to talk about something. A person, confident about who she is and unbeknowst to her, taught me to be confident about the person that I am. Because its ok for me to have my own taste. It's ok for me to have an opinion different from others and it's ok to express them. But what I treasure most about her is her ability show me a different perspective - to make me see how lucky I really am when I'm sometimes feeling ungrateful...because after all, I have a friend who despite all the craziness going on in her life will still be thoughtful enough to get my favorite cake on my graduation.

So there you have it. Now guess who!


Disclaimer: this post was induced by a bottle of Summer Nights.

I Used to be Crafty..

...waaay back in the day.

But I think it's safe to say that since I actually had friends (which didn't come until much later in high school), all my free time outside school was spent socializing and basking in all that I missed by being such a hermit at home. But during those 'I'm a loser with nothing to do on a Friday night days', I actually started to learn a few things here in there.... like knitting, crocheting, origami, etc. I even even made my high school graduation invitations.

Well, what better time to bring back the ole crafty me than planning for my wedding? Due to a limited budget and still over a year and a half before our projected wedding date, I plan on accomplishing the following DIY projects:

Centerpieces
Bridal Party accessories (probably a belt)
Table place cards
Save the dates
Isle decor

.....at least for now. I'm sure that looking online will give me a lot more ideas.

Here's a practice run at an origami flower project for possible place cards or just as napkin decor. Seemed pretty simple when I started but it turns out that each petal has to be individually folded. But hey, one flower down....200 more to go! errrrrrrrrrrrr times 5 petals = 1000 petals to fold!!!



Bridesmaids and girlfriends - Get your fingers ready for my bridal sweat shop = )


(excuse my terrible handwriting)

Now that the sappinness is over...

...Let’s talk about the fun stuff!

To me, the most fun wedding related activity is dress shopping. If you’re anything like me, I’m sure that you’ve been looking online for a wedding dress since the web was invented. I remember sketching mine when I was still in middle school. It was quite hideous…as it was a short body hugging inner layer with a sheer and poufy outer layer. But I watched a lot of Sailor Moon around that time and I’m sure I modeled it after one of her get-ups.

In high school, I wanted a huge ballroom gown with a cathedral train and veil. And of course, this had everything to do with the fact that I was completely and utterly in love with Prince William. I was sure he was the one. And I was going to be the ultimate princess bride.

In college – the emo days – it was all about the simple dress – no poof – and I was getting married on a beach somewhere….maybe even Boracay. But after college, I all of sudden started having hot flash issues and having a beach wedding where I would sweat profusely didn’t seem like such a good idea anymore.

And through further refinement of what I think would look good on me…what I think would be classy…would hide the pit fat…and flatter everything else, I found THE dress online about two years ago. Unfortunately, because I found it two years ago, it seems that the dress is actually nowhere to be found other than on the web. The style is called Alvina Valenta 9906. If anyone can find this dress for me, let me know ASAP!

AV9906

In the meantime, I didn’t waste any time taking advantage of a good sample sale. Last week, Priscilla of Boston had one of their blowout sales where sample dresses were an additional 50% off their already marked down price. It was the first time I had actually even tried on dresses and I acted like a little kid…no, a little kid deprived of any sweets…in a candy store. Thinking that it would be running-of-the-brides-esq, I arrive early just to ensure a spot…and of course, I felt just somewhat crazy when I find that I’m the only one waiting for them to open upon arrival. I walked out of that store with not one, but THREE dresses.

The first dress was nothing like I had envisioned myself in. It was strapless dress trumpet style dress with two bows in the back. Strapless was a big no-no to me but to my surprise, it didn’t make my pits look unflattering. I suppose that I was convinced because the dress fit me almost perfectly. I would really only need to adjust the height and that’s it! This dress cost me the most and I don’t wanna post how much because I’ve actually decided to try selling it. Here’s the listing

The second dress was very similar to what I had envisioned myself in. A dress with straps, flowy fit and flare, simple, and flattering. I felt great it in not only because of its stye but especially the price. I purchased that dress for a whopping $100. It was originally $4K and I just couldn’t, in my right mind, walk out of that store without that dress. (Not showing pics of this one =)

Lastly, while waiting from a fellow bride-to-be friend to arrive, I sifted through the bridesmaids gowns and found a gorgeous long black formal dress on sale for only $35. Someone have a black tie wedding so I can wear this dress please... And if not, maybe one of my bms can wear it to mine =)

So that’s my dress shopping journey so far. I’m still eyeing others (because I not getting married til 2012 and wedding dress shopping is just TOO fun) but I know that I have budget and there's really no room for me to exceed that.

A Wedding Story Begins...

with a memorable engagement story. That once in a lifetime moment when time stands still- the moment where all of your dreams of a man proposing finally comes true.

It all began at Christine Cueto's house. He was sitting in her kitchen looking salty and unhappy. And when my roommate slyly nudged me and whispered "That's him...he's single" followed by two eye brow gestures, I couldn't help but roll my eyes. Really? The cranky guy?

Almost exactly three months later, I sat on my bed and read out loud an email that I'll never forget. It read:

WILL YOU BE WILLING TO BE SEEN IN PUBLIC WITH ME, WILL YOU HELP ME MAKE IT OUT OF PHARM SCHOOL, WILL YOU JOIN ME ON WALKS IN THE PARK, WILL YOU GO WITH ME TO THE MALL TO PICK OUT CLOTHES, WILL YOU EAT PHO WITH ME, I guess what I'm trying to say is : WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME ????

Without hesitation, I look up at the man sitting by my side and said Yes.

Two years later, we're unloading a uhaul full of boxes into our first apartment together in Virginia.

A year past that, and he is graduating from pharmacy school. Our families meet for the first time during his graduation lunch and as he begins his "thank you for coming" speech, my sisters jaws drop because they think he's about to propose to me in front of everyone.

Yet another half a year passes and I get a pink eye staying up all night writing my final paper for my master's program. He gets up periodically to make me coffee...to keep me company....and in no time, I finally received my diploma as well.

And through more happiness, celebrations, tragedies, and life-hurdles, I sat in our apartment and waited...just like any other day...for him to come home from work.

I was a mess. My hair unkempt. My mascara and eyeliner smudged behind my eyeglasses. If you can imagine the least bit lady-like bum, that was me that night. When he finally arrived home, I was greeted with "Hey beautiful!". I smiled thinking to myself that Mr. Cranky was not cranky tonight.

Giving him a play-by-play of what I had done earlier in the evening, I gushed at our friend's recent engagement story. I joked that our friend had hidden the ring in the garment bag of his suit and that I was getting ready to sift through his garment bags too just in case. I suppose my story panicked him just a little. As it turns out, he had been hiding my ring in his suit garment bag as well.

The moments following were nothing but the two of us being silly with our guessing games. And as I opened my eyes from correctly guessing that I had nothing but a coin in my hand, I see him on his knees with a ring placed in his palms.

This was the moment when time stood still. I remember a big silly smile on his face. I remember a big silly smile on mine. I remember thinking if this was really happening right now. I remember thinking that I looked like a horrible mess. But the important part is that I remember saying....

Yes!














I'm not gonna lie...the ring makes it much more enjoyable to type ; )