It's House Hunting all Over Again!

...actually, I meant to say it's venue hunting but so far, it sure does feel like house hunting all over again

Putting the same rigor in researching venues as I did our house, all options are being considered. For the time being, I'm setting my eyes on downtown Philadelphia which is almost exactly halfway between our families. Through all the research (mainly photographer websites and wedding forums), I've found a few places that are somewhat within reach of our budget. To be exact, we're visiting seven venues and one church... all within one day during our next trip to Philadelphia.

I'm not quite sure how the day will go or if we'll actually be able to pull it off. But I am sure that the fiance and I will need lots of coffee, patience, and time management skills. In preparation for our venue-hunting day, I carefully planned out our appointment times so that we're hopping around Philly through the best, most efficient route:

Beginning at 10 am at Old St. Joseph's Church and ending at 4pm in the Northern Liberties neighborhood to see Cescaphe Ballroom and their new location Tendenza, I'm hoping that by the end of the day, we'll get a very good idea of how feasible a downtown Philadelphia wedding will be.


More updates to come once we actually see these places in person. For the time being, wish us luck!

Also, please share any questions that we should be asking the coordinators of these venues.

Thanks!

Not As Simple as Walking Down the Aisle...

Everyone knows it. Everyone talks about it to their close friends. But howcome you never see the not so fairytale side of weddings discussed out in the open? Hardly any mention of in bridal magazines and websites. Hardly any mention of it in wedding blogs...

You may have noticed my lack of posts as of late. In all honestly, it's because I've had a few of these items that I'm about to list weighing down on my mind. And when I seek advice from others, the common answer seems to be - The most important thing is what you and your groom wants. It's about your marriage and not anyone else's. And though true, the pressures of today's wedding "norm" has put that core concept of a wedding at the bottom of a very long list of delicate things that must be addressed in preparation for your special day.

So in no particular order...

1. Planning a large reception. For as long as I can remember, I've always wanted a fun wedding everyone eats well and dances afterwards. I'm not sure exactly where I got this idea from but cultural and media influences I'm sure played a role in this dream. And because we live in a capitalistic country, there are those that capitalized on the fact that millions of other girls are are dreaming up big wedding receptions. Therefore, the wedding industry emerged putting a large premium on anything wedding related. If you mention wedding at any venues, you are presented with a package showing a much higher price than if you were just planning any ole party. And the result? Let's just say that my groom is planning on picking up extra hours at work(even though I hardly ever see him) and I am now looking for a second part-time job.

2. Determining who will make the invite list. Because of #1, it's pretty much safe to say that we can't quite afford to invite everyone. Because people sometimes equate not being invited to a wedding as a sign of disrespect or that I guess you weren't really as good of a friend as you thought, then it makes this whole business of planning a wedding very political. Rather than focusing on each other's relationships, the bride and groom now have to assess their relationship with everyone else. Will this person be hurt if they don't get invite? Will they no longer talk to me? Will it affect me professionally?

3. Making sure both families are happy. Aside from a bride and groom making the commitment to God and to each other, weddings I think are also a symbolism of two families coming together. But when the two families have different traditions, beliefs, requests, and suggestions, it translates into difficult decisions for the bride and groom. How do you make both families happy? Although holding separate celebrations might satisfy the differences of both sides, it is not in the spirits of bringing two families together. In trying to determine the solution, the bride and groom will likely realize that there's really no way to make everyone happy. And although in the end...is the bride and groom's day after all...how do you say no your family?

4. Choosing who is in your wedding party. Looking through wedding forums, I'm amazed to see how many posts are about friendships that have ended because one wasn't chosen to be in the wedding party. And I'm wondering...does not being in someones wedding party really mean that you're no longer friends?

5. Expectations of your wedding party. A second popular topics in wedding forums are about how many friendships have ended because one was a disappointing bridesmaid or moh. It seems that in this day and age, there is so much emphasis on what being in the bridal party means and the responsibilities that go along with that. When reading through some of these forums, I often wonder how people could let a few "mistakes" relating to all one day trump all that their friendship has meant every day prior to the wedding.

I'm sure there are alot more to this list that can be added. But for now, I might have already shot myself in the foot by posting some of these. At least I know that I'm not the only one nor was I ever the first one to thing about these.

How about you? What are you currently/or have experienced relating to these topics and how did you address them?